Pitch, Please Seven
Welcome back to Pitch, Please, where I pitch sure-to-be film successes inventing movie premises based on prompts that I write with a little help from my old friend, the internet. Last time’s prompt was:
When the Baker family moved to a sleepy little town in the Northeast, they thought they were moving into their dream home… until they discovered an infestation of walking, happy Christmas trees. Now they are trapped in a nightmare they can’t escape: the phones are dead, help is nowhere to be found, and presents are everywhere. If they want to stop the terror, there’s only one person they can turn to for help: the Grinch.
Finally. Someone else who truly understands franchise potential.
I can see the trailer now…
The Baker family move into a small town. Imagine overhead shots of lush, northeastern foliage just starting to change colors. It’s early October. As the family of five arrive at their new house, it looks a little rundown, but dad rubs his hands together in that “nothing can possibly go wrong” kind of way.
Cut to night. A little girl, with swirly, curled hair, gets out of bed to get a cup of water.
Something skitters around a corner. Cindy turns, gasping. She steps closer. More skittering, louder this time. She peeks around a corner…
The cup of water shatters against the floor as a living, walking Christmas rises to its full height in front of her.
“We need help!” the mother shouts into the phone. “It’s not even Halloween yet!”
“Halloween can’t keep you safe,” says a familiar voice on the other line. “Not anymore.”
The Grinch arrives with a tool chest and Max in tow. “These stockings,” he says, approaching the fireplace. “Are the first thing to go.”
Suddenly there’s a banging noise in the hall. The son is desperately trying to hold a closet door closed, but it rattles and batters against the frame. The door slips open and presents spill out onto the floor.
“Careful!” Grinch shouts. “Those could be Jing Tinglers or Flu Floopers, or…” A look of horror crosses his face. “…Tar tinkers!”
The screen goes dark. Text reads: “There’s only one person who can save the Bakers, now…”
THE MEAN ONE. Coming October 2022, from Universal.
Want to be a part of movie history? Feel free to help me fill in the blanks on this next prompt in the comments or on Twitter @SharpeWrites with the hashtag, #pitchplease.
Next time’s prompt is:
Sawyer Jackson was a simple, down-home lawyer content to pass his days in paperwork and folksy charm. But that was before he was handed a case that would change his life. When a teenage runaway from the wrong side of the tracks come to him with a problem he knows he can’t ignore, Sawyer will have to take to the courtroom and answer one of the great questions of our age: _____________________
In a searing legal drama, he’ll fight for truth, defy the odds, and stun the jury with his _____________________.